ARE YOU A WRITER? THEN WRITE!

Great to have BestSelling author and social media expert Rachel Thompson as a guest on DyingWords. I follow Rachel on her sites, BadRedHeadMedia and Rachel in the OC, and love her No-BS style. She generously agreed to share some thoughts on writing.

I noticed an extremely talented writer friend hadn’t blogged for awhile, so I checked in on her last night. She decided to take a break due to some harsh comments from those supposedly ‘in the know,’ and was taking time to lick her wounds and hadn’t written in months. I am a true fan, and was shocked to see her so affected. But I could relate.

Been there, done that. I gave her this advice: ‘Screw ‘em. Trust your voice. They’re jealous of your amazing talent, and by silencing you, they are somehow feeling better about their lack of it.’

Write, my dear friends. Ignore what THEY say. Trust your voice, believe in yourself. You are amazing.

‘YOU CAN’T WRITE’

I’ve been there. Someone I respected, who was ‘in the know,’ told me that my work wasn’t ‘ready for publication, was boring, that nobody would read it.’ So, I walked away from that situation. Doesn’t matter who that person is. What’s important is that I listened, I let it affect me, and I crawled into a dark, gray hole. For a nanosecond.

SO I WROTE ANYWAY

And then completely ignored this person’s advice, wrote Broken Pieces, the book this person said nobody would read, because I trusted my voice. And it not only changed my life, it also connected me to so many amazing survivors, writers, readers, bloggers, reviewers…to PEOPLE I likely would never have otherwise met.

LET PEOPLE HELP YOU

Your first draft is going to be awful. Terrible. Shit. So what? You’re no different than…

Ernest Hemingway: “The first draft of anything is shit” or

Anne Lamott: “Almost all good writing begins with terrible first efforts. You need to start somewhere. Start by getting something—anything—down on paper. What I’ve learned to do when I sit down to work on a shitty first draft is to quiet the voices in my head.”

I personally refer to my first drafts as ‘word vomit.’ The problem, I’ve discovered, is that most new writers try too hard to make their writing perfect on the first try (impossible, I tell you!), so that when they receive criticism (and they will), they crumple. I was no different. So…what to do?

Blogging helps. Share your writing.

But when it comes to getting ready for publication (no matter which direction you take), hire a writing coach, or a professional editor, someone who knows about writing and does this for a living. Not your Aunt Edna who used to correct English papers back in the day.

You are too close to it to edit your own work. And by edit, I do not mean grammar and proof — no, no, no. I mean structural edits — looking at the entire content and seeing what flows, what fits, what doesn’t, what needs revision, what needs to be cut.

BUT I HAVE NO MONEY!

Gosh, if I had a nickel for every time I’ve heard this, I’d be rich by now. I get it, I do. I’m there, too. But guess what? Your book will not sell if it’s riddled with errors. You cannot afford not to hire a professional. Would you do your own heart surgery? No.

Besides, there are terrific options now: crowdfund using Pubslush (a crowdfunding platform just for book projects), look at Bibliocrunch (find quality professionals for your book publishing needs within your budget), barter services, whatever! Make it happen.

Point is this: writers write.

Don’t let anyone influence you about you. Trust your voice. Protect it, above all else.

Figure the rest out later.

“Express yourself, don’t repress yourself” ~ Madonna (Human Nature)

* * *

Rachel Thompson is the author of the award-winning Broken Pieces, as well as two additional humor books, A Walk In The Snark and Mancode: Exposed. Rachel is published and represented by Booktrope.

She owns BadRedhead Media, creating effective social media and book marketing campaigns for authors, and Rachel in the OC where she gives writing and marketing advice.

Her articles appear regularly in The Huffington Post, The San Francisco Book Review (BadRedhead Says…), 12Most.com, bitrebels.com, BookPromotion.com, and Self-Publishers Monthly.

Rachel is the creator and founder of #MondayBlogs and #SexAbuseChat and an advocate for sexual abuse survivors. She hates walks in the rain, running out of coffee, and coconut. She lives in California with her family.

Watch for Rachel Thompson’s new book, Broken Places, which is being released shortly.

DYING WITH DIGNITY

Let’s face it. We’re all going to die one day. You. Me. Our parents. Our children. Friends. Neighbours. Co-workers. Even our pets. It makes me wonder why we have so much trouble accepting the inevitable, especially in artificially prolonging life when a person’s entire quality of life is gone, never to return, and they spend their final days in suffering – not just pain and discomfort, but in a total loss of their dignity as a human being.

During my time as a coroner I heard from a lot of family members about the agony that not only the deceased suffered in their final days, but what the ones left behind endured. Inevitably that led to discussions about the ethics of euthanasia.

Euthanasia was also a topic behind closed doors within my medical and legal colleagues. Without question, there are cases of assisted suicide that are overlooked by the authorities and I’m sure that some of the ‘natural’ deaths in seniors care homes are ‘helped along’ by a generous dose of pain killer.

Several years ago I watch as my ninety-five year old mother wasted away in the final months of her long and fulfilled life. It was absolute agony, not so much for Mum, because she was medicated to the point of being mostly unconscious, but for myself and other family members. To see such a vibrant person being ‘punished’ by dragging out her journey to everlasting peace and tranquility was heartbreaking.

I did a lot of soul searching during that time.

I’ll admit that it was tempting to intervene and put Mum out of her misery. I know that’s what she wanted, because we’d had that discussion, but the legal ramifications were far too serious to consider bringing that monster into the family. So, we just bided our time while she literally wasted away in a nursing home bed until her life and dignity exhausted.

I wouldn’t treat my dog that way. When his quality of life is gone, I’ll take him into the vet and have him put to sleep. After all, it’s the humane thing to do.

So why are we so cruel to our fellow humans?

I say the problem lies right in the hands of our legal system. Not our ‘justice’ system. Our ‘legal’ system.

There’s a fine line between the moral and practical approach to death. It’s the moral tail that wags the practical dog in the debate over euthanasia and it needs to be put to rest.

Don’t get me wrong. I’m not advocating involuntary euthanasia or playing God against a terminally ill person’s wishes. That’s a ‘slippery slope’ for society to slide down. I’m talking about the legalization of medically assisted suicide, or mercy killing, when the patient – in sound mind – has clearly expressed their desire to be euthanized when their quality of life has expired.

We’ve been using Do Not Resuscitate (DNR) orders for years and our system totally accepts the moral and legal reasoning behind them. We also ‘pull-the plug’ on people who are brain dead but their body still functions.

What I want for myself, and I’ve told my next-of-kin this, is a Put Me Out Of Misery (PMOOM) order. When my quality of life is gone, the last thing I want to do is unnecessarily delay the inevitable. Out of sheer respect for my dignity, somebody please give me a push over the edge.

I believe it’s the humane thing to do, but that’s just my opinion.

What do you think? I’m dying to hear your words.

HOW SPECIAL OPERATION FORCES FUNCTION IN CATASTROPHES

Bob Mayer is a US Army West Point graduate, Green Beret Special Forces veteran, and a prolific writer, publisher, and teacher. He’s also a down-to-earth guy who’s mission is to help others succeed. Thanks, Bob, for sharing your experience about preparing for chaos.

Catastrophe planning in the civilian world is primarily the province of engineers and management. The problem with that is engineers and management are trained for, plan for, and work in a controlled environment (what they think is a controlled environment). So delusion events are outside their comfort zone; aberrations.

In fact, engineers and managers are often trained to be blind to cascade events. Their training and work environment normally does not reward focusing on cascade events, but rather punishes it.

West Point is an extraordinarily controlled environment. Things run almost perfectly there; so much so that graduates often have problems adjusting to the ‘real’ Army they go into. But West Point also has over 200 years of experience training leaders and preparing soldiers for war. This accumulation of institutional knowledge is inculcated in cadets in a high-pressure cauldron of mental, physical, and emotional stress for four years.

Of course, sometimes it doesn’t take, as you’d see in one of the events I cover in Shit Doesn’t Just Happen – The Gift of Failure. This book focuses on a number of colossal failures, including West Point’s most notorious graduate – Breverant Colonel George Armstrong Custer.

Special Operations soldiers train for war. War is called controlled chaos; an incessant series of cascade events. War might be considered the ultimate catastrophe and combat a final event. In order to prepare for this final event, Special Operations soldiers train for, plan for, and work in a chaotic environment every day.

Mentally, the most difficult training I went through was Robin Sage, the final exercise in the Special Forces Qualification Course. Robin Sage is where a team of students is sent into isolation, and then infiltrates into the North Carolina countryside to conduct a guerilla warfare exercise. A critical component of Robin Sage is to put prospective Green Berets in lose-lose scenarios. This is a training scenario where there is no ‘right’ solution. Rigid minds are often unable to think creatively while under stress and lose-lose training quickly determines someone’s capabilities.

Thinking outside of the immediate situation is important in preparing for and averting catastrophes.

Do you remember in the Star Trek movie (Wrath of Khan) when Captain Kirk talks about being at Star Fleet Academy and being the only officer to have passed the Kobayashi Maru simulator program?

The basic problem and the opening of the movie was set up this way: A Star Fleet ship which the student commands is patrolling near the neutral zone. A distress call is received from a disabled Federation vessel inside the neutral zone. An enemy warship is approaching from the other side. It’s a vessel more powerful than the one the student commands. The choices seem obvious: ignore the distress call (which violates the law of space) or go to its aid (violating the neutral zone) and face almost certain destruction from the enemy vessel. As you can see, both choices are bad.

What Kirk did was sneak into the computer center the night before he was scheduled to go through the simulation and change the parameters so that he could successfully save the vessel without getting destroyed. Would you have thought of that? Was it cheating? If you ain’t cheating you ain’t trying. It’s not cheating when it succeeds.

A key to lose-lose training is you get to see how someone reacts when they are wrong or fail. Lose-lose training is a good way to put people in a crisis. Frustration can often lead to anger, which can lead to failure or enlightenment.

If a catastrophe struck, whom would you want at your side helping you?

A doctor? Lawyer? Engineer? MBA? Teacher? While they all have special skills, I submit that the overwhelming choice might well be a US Special Forces Green Beret or, the best in the business – a British 22SAS. Someone trained in survival, medicine, weapons, tactics, communications, engineering, counter-terrorism, tactical and strategic intelligence, and with the capability to be a force multiplier.

Most important, you want someone who has been handpicked, survived rigorous training, and has the positive mental outlook to not only survive, but thrive in chaos, and knows how to be part of a team. Green Berets have been called Masters of Chaos. They don’t manage. They lead.

The key to dealing with catastrophes is leadership, not management.

Often, in order to deal with a cascade event, leadership and courage are needed to go against a culture of complacency and fear. In every catastrophe, fear is a factor in at least one, if not more, cascade events. This fear runs the gamut from physical fear, to job security fear, to social fear, to physical fear. Few people want to be the ‘boy who cries wolf’ even when they see a pack of wolves. What’s even harder is when we’re the only one who sees the wolf in sheep’s clothing.

I’ve written Shit Doesn’t Just Happen: The Gift of Failure to help individuals and organizations avoid catastrophes, but I come at it from a different direction as a former Special Operations soldier. In the Special Forces (Green Berets) the key to our successful missions was the planning. The preparation. In isolation, we war-gamed as many possible catastrophe situations we could imagine for any upcoming mission and prepared as well as we could for them. In fact, we expected things to go wrong, a very different mindset from that of engineers and management.

We were firm believers in Murphy’s Law: What can go wrong, will. In other words: Shit doesn’t just happen. It will happen.

Our job was to deal with it.

* * *

Bob Mayer is a NY Times Bestselling author, graduate of West Point, former Green Beret (including commanding an A-Team) and the feeder of two Yellow Labs, most famously Cool Gus.

Bob’s had over 60 books published including the #1 series Area 51, Atlantis and The Green Berets. Born in the Bronx, having travelled the world (usually not tourist spots), he now lives peacefully with his wife, and said labs, at Write on the River, TN.

Thanks, Bob. You’re a great writer, a great teacher, and great pathfinder in the publishing business. Like some guys that we know say – “Who Dares Wins“.

Great to have BestSelling author and social media expert Rachel Thompson as a guest on DyingWords. I follow Rachel on her sites, BadRedHeadMedia and Rachel in the OC, and love her No-BS style. She generously agreed to share some thoughts on writing.

Been there, done that. I gave her this advice: ‘Screw ‘em. Trust your voice. They’re jealous of your amazing talent, and by silencing you, they are somehow feeling better about their lack of it.’

‘YOU CAN’T WRITE’

SO I WROTE ANYWAY

LET PEOPLE HELP YOU

Blogging helps. Share your writing.

BUT I HAVE NO MONEY!

Point is this: writers write.

Don’t let anyone influence you about you. Trust your voice. Protect it, above all else.

Figure the rest out later.

* * *

Rachel Thompson is the author of the award-winning Broken Pieces, as well as two additional humor books, A Walk In The Snark and Mancode: Exposed. Rachel is published and represented by Booktrope.

She owns BadRedhead Media, creating effective social media and book marketing campaigns for authors, and Rachel in the OC where she gives writing and marketing advice.

Her articles appear regularly in The Huffington Post, The San Francisco Book Review (BadRedhead Says…), 12Most.com, bitrebels.com, BookPromotion.com, and Self-Publishers Monthly.

Rachel is the creator and founder of #MondayBlogs and #SexAbuseChat and an advocate for sexual abuse survivors. She hates walks in the rain, running out of coffee, and coconut. She lives in California with her family.

Watch for Rachel Thompson’s new book, Broken Places, which is being released shortly.

During my time as a coroner I heard from a lot of family members about the agony that not only the deceased suffered in their final days, but what the ones left behind endured. Inevitably that led to discussions about the ethics of euthanasia.

I did a lot of soul searching during that time.

So why are we so cruel to our fellow humans?

I say the problem lies right in the hands of our legal system. Not our ‘justice’ system. Our ‘legal’ system.

I believe it’s the humane thing to do, but that’s just my opinion.

What do you think? I’m dying to hear your words.

Bob Mayer is a US Army West Point graduate, Green Beret Special Forces veteran, and a prolific writer, publisher, and teacher. He’s also a down-to-earth guy who’s mission is to help others succeed. Thanks, Bob, for sharing your experience about preparing for chaos.

In fact, engineers and managers are often trained to be blind to cascade events. Their training and work environment normally does not reward focusing on cascade events, but rather punishes it.

Thinking outside of the immediate situation is important in preparing for and averting catastrophes.

If a catastrophe struck, whom would you want at your side helping you?

The key to dealing with catastrophes is leadership, not management.

We were firm believers in Murphy’s Law: What can go wrong, will. In other words: Shit doesn’t just happen. It will happen.

Our job was to deal with it.

* * *

Bob Mayer is a NY Times Bestselling author, graduate of West Point, former Green Beret (including commanding an A-Team) and the feeder of two Yellow Labs, most famously Cool Gus.

Bob’s had over 60 books published including the #1 series Area 51, Atlantis and The Green Berets. Born in the Bronx, having travelled the world (usually not tourist spots), he now lives peacefully with his wife, and said labs, at Write on the River, TN.

Thanks, Bob. You’re a great writer, a great teacher, and great pathfinder in the publishing business. Like some guys that we know say – “Who Dares Wins“.

Bob runs three websites:

http://www.bobmayer.org/

http://coolgus.com/

http://writeitforward.wordpress.com/

Follow Bob on Twitter @Bob_Mayer

His Facebook page is https://www.facebook.com/authorbobmayer