Okay, Mister Expert in death and writing…

(I’m an expert because I’ve investigated hundreds upon hundreds of human deaths as a cop and a coroner and I’ve written a lot of mostly boring shit about the causes of death. Seriously, I have)…

So what is death and what wonderful wisdom do you have about writing?

First of all, I truly believe that death is not the end of the line for you.

You’re okay with that, right?

To be straight with you, I’ve never been there myself, but I’ve come really, really, frikkin close to death and I don’t mean by just bagging and autopsying cadavers.

I came so close to being shot to death that it scared me out of my state of local consciousness and into another entire realm of sensory existence.

It’s called a near-death or fear-death encounter. Zillions of other people have experienced the same phenomena and mountainsides of trees have died to support their reports, so I’m nothing special in that regard.

But there was something weird, really weird, about my encounter that caused many to question whether paranormal intervention occurred.

It’s a crazy story, but something happened there that you don’t see everyday. There’s already one book written about my case and I have a novel coming out shortly, based on the ‘Teslin Lake Incident’. That’s for another day and, no, I’m not trying to sell you a book. Yet.

I became fascinated with death and spent the remainder of my spared life investigating death. Now I want to share my knowledge with you.

And I know you’re fascinated with death.

Go ahead. Admit it.

Everyone wonders what’s behind the black door.

And a lot of us are absolutely shit-scared to find out.

In fact, the fear of death is second only to the fear of public speaking, and I still get the jitters about that.

But I’m cool with death.

Why? Because I accept that it’s part of life.

It’s going to happen to all of us. You. Me. Your family. Your dog and your cat. Your friends. Even the biggest asshole you ever met is going to cross-over some day.

You just don’t know when.

So here’s the goods.

Death is part of the life cycle and you go back to the same place you were before you were born.

Oh, for sure your body will decompose as your matter and energy are transformed.

But ‘you’… that tiny spark of consciousness that makes you alive.. that is seeing, reading, and processing my words… doesn’t extinguish.

It just changes form and carries on. Just like the bugs do with your flesh and bones.

I believe that spark… call it your soul… alters it’s local state of consciousness and re-attaches itself to that cloud of non-local consciousness that gives order to everything… that plane of infinite intelligence.

I call it God. Seems a good word. It’s been used a lot.

You atheists uncomfortable enough?

Good. Because I think you’re fulla shit if you believe in athiesm. Same goes for Scientology. And Jehovah’s Witnesses.  Like, there’s only 144,000 seats in heaven. My God, those guys piss me off.

Stick with me, because in some upcoming blog I’m going to take a shot at the Christian’s immaculate conception and resurrection beliefs. I also don’t get the ‘Allah Akbar’ thing before blowing yourself up.

Now Shamanism makes sense to me, but that’s for another blog, as well.

See, I tagged this blog ‘Provoking Thoughts’ for a reason. I want to provoke your thoughts. 

What do you think happens after you die?

Am I fulla shit, too?

I’m dying to hear your words.